This is a relatively new concept for me, the idea that those people around us mirror back to us who we really are and what we think of ourselves – both in a positive and negative way.
I had my daughter mirror back to me not too long ago. On a day I felt particularly out of shape and unlovely, she walked up to me cheerfully. Then she looked at me, patted my belly and told me my Buddha belly was really big today. Needless to say, I was quite irritated – although she didn’t mean to hurt me.
Once I started to be aware of others mirroring back, initially I only saw the negative. That friend ignored me when I was feeling unloved. The friend didn’t invite me when I was feeling like an outsider. My girls were angry with each other and me when I was in a foul, angry mood….
But once I really started looking, I started to see some positive things mirrored back to me.
Why is it, though, that the positive about ourselves is so much harder to accept than the negative? Even though what we crave is the positive.